Sue-shi

I may need to stop eating sushi. I love sushi. And it's good for you. But I never know how to calculate the calories, as much as I try, and so I'm either overestimating or underestimating and either way the scale isn't happy today.

I ate two trays of Harris Teeter sushi yesterday: one tray had four tiny pieces each of shrimp, tuna, salmon and eel sushi. One tray had six of the larger sushi: two salmon, two shrimp and two tuna. Plus six small pieces of tuna and avocado. (Man, when I see it in print like that, maybe it was way too much sushi.) It was my main meal for the day. And I estimated it at a little less than 700 calories. But maybe I was way off.

I didn't eat much else during the day: oatmeal and a banana for breakfast; a lean cuisine fish dish for dinner.

Anyway, the scale is up today.

Oh, and I ran in the morning, a good run in the rain where I went 2.25 miles straight and then ran/walked the last mile.

So perhaps it's too much sushi. But buying the one tray never seems to fill me up.

Sigh. I guess that's why I'm fat.

In a funk

I'm not sure exactly what my problem is, but I'm blaming it on the rain (which I usually love) and being in an apartment full of mice (and the strangest bug I've ever seen with like 20 long legs and a funky body). I can only guess the annoying work done on my roof has brought these creatures to me. I'm hoping my landlord replies to my e-mail soon - he's out of town - and can find out how they're all getting into my home. I'm braver than I thought I would be, but now it's just annoying.

Anyway, I've just been in a funk the past two days. I've slept a lot, which can be good, but I still haven't been able to come up with a good way to present tomorrow's class lesson. Inspiration better come to me fast.

I was successful on Sunday morning, weighing in exactly where I wanted to be. But then I snacked way, way too much during the day. I didn't eat bad things, but I ate too many of the good things I had (almonds, Kashi trail mix cookies, Weight Watchers snacks). Stopped counting calories, which is no good.

Today, I kind of went the opposite direction. I've finished the day only eating 928 calories. But there was just nothing I wanted and I was feeling so blue about Sunday's excess. Believe me, I know eating under 1,200 calories is very bad for you. But I really have no desire to go eat 300 calories right now, at 10 p.m., just to meet that minimum.

I hope getting back into the swing of my run/class/work tomorrow will get me back on track.

I'm looking forward to tomorrow's run, even though I'm sure it will be a rainy mess outside (and depending on how this lesson plan goes, I may only get a few hours' sleep). But it was so great seeing progress at Saturday's race. I looked back on my previous times and my three-miler time Saturday was the best since April. Granted, my mile splits got worse after three miles, but I am still very pleased. I can't wait for the next race.

Here's to trying, trying, trying....

Good day

Today's race was pretty good; it was hard for me (for some reason, each mile felt like three) but it wasn't my worst 8K ever, which pleased me. And my time for the first three miles was the best I've had for quite awhile. So maybe I'm making progress.

It was quite warm today and a little humid but a glorious day overall.

It was depressing getting ready for the race, though. Everything I put on to wear looked horrid and I knew any race pictures taken would be awful. But getting out there was more important. My hope is that I can just keep pushing, keep trying and that maybe the next race pics won't be as bad.

Tomorrow marks two weeks of sticking to my diet. I had a goal to lose two pounds this week but I don't think that will be the case. Not for lack of trying. But for some reason, when I run longer and drink lots and lots of water/Gatorade, the water just stays. Feels like that's happening again today. I keep telling myself not to worry about what the scale says tomorrow. I hope that the memories of the race and the hope for more good races to come will keep me on track.

This is where it gets hard

Ever since Sunday, the scale has been stuck, and this is where it gets hard. I eat right and get out there for runs (today's was great, with my lowest 3-mile time this month) but then I see no progress on the scale. Yes, I've only gone about a week and a half being on the ball, so it's ridiculous that I already expect to see results. But tell my brain that.

I am so silly.

Anyway, the good news is that I feel good and I haven't kicked the scale once. I'm trying to be patient this time around and realize that the alternative - the slow creep upward on the scale - is not a desirable option. It scares me because I know how easy it is to enter a new 10-pound category. I've got to nip this before it gets out of control.

My first goal is to get back to the last weigh-in amount I listed on MyFitnessPal.com. 210. I'm now at 214. The next goal will be that hard push to get under 200. From there, I'll reassess. Funny how my first two goals are to get back to where I was in APRIL. But such is the life of a yo-yo dieter who can't seem to get her act together.

I'm trying and that's all I can do right now.

I have a race on Saturday I'm excited about (8K) and hope I'll see some progress. But I know I need to be realistic on what "progress" means for me at this stage.

Musings

So it's the beginning of the Fall TV season, which is always fun. But I'm already bummed.

I had read some good things about "Mike and Molly," about how the show is simply a romance that just happens to have two overweight people in the relationship. That it wasn't going to be a show that focused on their weight.

WRONG.

It's a cheap, disgusting sitcom that makes fun of fat people with every page of dialogue. I mean, it was so awful. If you substituted the fat jokes for jokes against a race or religion or gender, this country would be up in arms. It was just further proof that people think there's nothing wrong with joking about a person's weight. It was really sad to watch.

Needless to say, I won't be watching it again.

I've preset my VCR (yes, I still have one of those) for The Biggest Loser tonight, but I'm really unsure if I want to watch it. It got me really mad last spring, and I swore I wouldn't watch it again. But I haven't made a firm decision yet.

In other news, I've been doing rather well in the eating and exercise departments, despite my crazy-busy schedule. This morning/last night I was feeling blue because I wasn't sure what to do about my class and I was fretting over their poor performance on a test. I was depressed and really didn't want to go to class. Then something very odd happened that turned my attitude around.

I caught a mouse.

Yeah, so that mouse who appeared back in June or July never showed his little face again and I put away the traps. Then at 5 a.m. Monday, I was doing some work in the living room, and the little bugger appeared again. I was freaked, but he did look very small and quickly went back into the utility closet. So I put the traps back out. And this morning, there he was in one of them. They're humane traps (I got them at PETA), but I still felt awful seeing the little guy trying to free himself from the plastic box. So I took him outside, down the block, to a nice grassy place and opened the trap to let him out. He just sat there, not wanting to leave, but finally he scrambled into the bushes.

I felt good after that. I know I should be freaked out, but he was sweet and I hope he's enjoying the outdoors now.

Looking forward to enjoying the outdoors myself tomorrow for a little run. Maybe I'll see him out there.

Up and running

I'm already late for work and it's only 10:40 a.m. (I got home at 1:30 a.m. from work). But I did get in a decent run and feel pretty good about that. I ran for two miles straight and then just walked the whole last mile. I'm a wee bit worried about my calf, which is tender. I figured my goal today was to see if I could run more than 1.75 miles straight and after I achieved that, I wasn't going to push myself only to hurt myself.

As you can see, I still have a long way to go in this quest to up my speed. I don't want to say it's doubtful I won't achieve my PR goal at the October race, but, yeah, it's doubtful. But I'm not worried. I just want to do well and train well and not hurt myself in the meantime.

OK, better get going...

Whew, a breather!

So I made it through the two weeks alive and actually feeling good. I finished the proofreading job, taught and prepared my classes without feeling like a fool, ran twice this week (one eight-miler, one three-miler) and three times last week (one seven-miler and two three-milers), worked at the paper AND, at least this week, have been eating healthfully.

I'm glad for a little breather. Unfortunately, I won't be able to sleep in like I had hoped tomorrow because I have an early shift. I hope, hope, hope I will have the energy to run beforehand. Today's wasn't as good as last week's and I want another shot!

I was worried about eating poorly at lunch today because I went out to eat at a new place, but I ended up having the most delicious salad. All it had in it were mixed greens, grapes, pears, gorgonzola cheese and a very, very light vinaigrette. I felt good for ordering it AND full, despite having little protein.

OK, well, it's back to work. Just wanted to let you know I'm still hanging in there!

2 out of 3 ain't bad

Didn't run yesterday but did manage to get out there this morning, where I did 3 miles total, with 1.75 straight. Did it in a minute less than Tuesday's run and three and a half minutes less than last Thursday's. Of course it was cooler today. But I was very happy. I was even able to sprint in the end and also earlier when I thought I was about to get run over.

I keep thinking how much easier it would be if I weighed less. Gosh, why is it so hard? Why can't I get my act together?

Two-week blitz

This week and next week are going to be a bit hectic for me, as I take on a third job. I won't play martyr - I have been wanting proofreading work all summer - but it will indeed be a juggle trying to teach/plan for class, proofread a book, work at the paper and get some running in. I've mapped out these two weeks down to the hour. Let's hope I can keep myself running into next week. It will be quite a success if I do (and not use the time to catch up on sleep).

I had two really good runs recently: On Sunday, I am thrilled to say, I was able to do seven miles. It was slow, alas, but I did it and I actually felt great. I'm guessing the cooler weather helped.

This morning, despite having a horrible night of sleep, I did a three-miler and it was the quickest I've done since the July races. Still slow. But progress is being made.

I still haven't made a firm decision on the half marathon in November; I want to do it, but I don't want to do it unless I'm prepared. I may wait until mid-October to decide.

Forgive me if I don't write much these two weeks. I'll try my darndest, but I don't see much downtime in the future.

Whew

I survived the hurricane newsroom pizza extravaganza, but I admit the only reason was because I was so stressed I couldn't get up from my chair.

It also helped that I brought a Lean Cuisine pizza, which satisfied my pizza craving.

I also successfully avoided cupcakes tonight.

Oh hurricane snacks, you tempt me so!

This week sure has been exhausting. I have a busy, busy to-do list for the weekend, but I still hope to get some running in. I was bummed that I didn't run this morning, but the Tuesday and Wednesday outings were really nice. I'd try tomorrow but I have to be at work in 11.5 hours and I'd really like much of that to take place in my bed.

Off to that bed I speak fondly of....

I'm still holding on

Don't have time to write but wanted to let you know I'm still hanging in there, though I didn't run today because I'm wiped out.

Hurricane a-coming, classwork up the wazoo. So tired. Will try very, very hard to resist any storm treats at work tonight.

Back again shortly.