A few thoughts...
1. We'll start with today's weigh-in: 196 pounds, down 8 pounds from last week, though we all know that's mostly water weight. It will be harder this week, but I am thrilled to be below 200 and, as always, hope I can stay there.
2. It was still dark outside when I woke up this morning having a small anxiety attack: "What was I thinking? I can't run a marathon! Why in the world did I tell people about it? I need to take the blog down. I can't do this." I've been feeling this way a lot lately, and it may have hit home harder last night when I was putting songs on my new iPod. I was trying to match songs with where I'd be on the course, and my heart started pounding as I put songs around the 5-hour mark. You see, I need to get to mile 20 in 5 hours or they'll pull me off the course. It's called "Beat the Bridge" and they open up the roads at 1 p.m. I'm terrified I won't make it. I can't imagine training this hard and then being forced to get into the "sag wagon" because I just couldn't get there fast enough.
On a lighter note, I ended my playlist with "Hallelujah."
3. My boyfriend surprised me with a gift yesterday: A 2009 Marine Corps Marathon T-shirt for training (see above). It was such a sweet gesture and it made me realize the day is fast approaching. (Unfortunately, I'm too fat for the shirt and will need to exchange it...I can't wait for the day I can wear women's running shirts comfortably.) I am very blessed to have someone in my life who supports me and believes in me like he does.
4. Yesterday's massage: The good news is I was told I have less build-up in my knee. Bad news is that my patella is moving outward when I run b/c the outside of my legs are tight and the insides are weak. So yet another exercise/stretch to work on. But she didn't seem to think there was anything majorly wrong, though that could turn into something bad if I don't get it taken care of.
5. Today's four miles started off great: The first two miles were perfect and I had my new iPod and my legs were refreshed (having not run since Thursday). But I procrastinated getting outside and didn't start my run until 9:45 or so. By the time I was done, it was 89 degrees but, according to the Weather Channel, felt like 98. Needless to say, the last two miles were much harder. It was blazin' hot. But I finished, stretched and iced and had a nice Power Cut class afterward.
6. As I started today's run, I came across a street full of caterpillars. And as I dodged them -- and then saw cars driving past -- I started thinking about the rough road those little guys have before they can become butterflies. They have a ton of obstacles in their way, yet so many make it and turn into the most beautiful creatures. I told myself I need to remember the caterpillars as I continue on this journey. If I can dodge all the obstacles coming at me, the end result could be something beautiful indeed.
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